The day I met my child's mother, I dreaded this and never wanted this to happen. Termination was supposed to have gone through before she was released from prison. Unfortunately, the scheduling was off by a few weeks and a visit was granted. Two years ago this meeting between us would have went very differently.
We got the news telling us that her release date and our court date for TPR was a few weeks apart. Due to her rights still intact she had the right to see her children one last time before possibly losing her rights forever. She was fighting the fact that the state wanted to take her rights away of being a parent. Truth be told, she had no shot in winning, she just served three years behind bars for what she did to these same children she was fighting for.
Kristin usually does these visits with the kids, I have never met a bio face to face. This time was different, this person almost killed our child. She is a very dangerous person, she plead out of serving for attempt of murder. This was not the first time she lost children though, it seems like it is a vicious cycle for her. This visit Kristin asked me to go along, there was no way her anxiety was going to let her go in this solo.
A few days before the scheduled appointment, I decided this time, Kristin needs to sit out. With being pregnant and her high emotions; especially what we have gone through after receiving this child in such bad shape. I was adamant that this one I needed to do for me, I wanted to go in and gain the upper hand for us and our child. Although when we arrived, I have never experienced my body shaking so badly.
Our 4 year old child and I pulled up to the building and right away tensions were high for both. We walked into the building and into a very small room with this monster and her attorney. We held hands the entire time, our child was completely comfortable and connected with me. They never once made eye contact, I never saw my daughter ignore anyone, she must of remembered or knew who was in the room with us.
Once I stopped shaking I sat down across the table from this woman that I've hated for about 2 years now. Me and my daughter acted for a while as if she was never there, as she watched us interact. Her attorney was smiling and asked if we can adopt her as well. I looked at my child's mother and started asking her questions of how the child was born and other things that we have always wanted to know. She answered all my questions and I proceeded to tell her what it was like to be us. All the details I had planned to give the judge in two weeks to testify why she is unsafe to be around any children, let alone our baby girl.
After an hour of “Natalie” and this person that gave birth to her, her attacker, we said our good byes. This little girl walked out without looking at anyone, holding her head high. This woman that I thought nothing but negative thoughts for so long grabbed my arm. I turned around, she pulled me in and hugged me. She said to me loud enough for the room to hear, “I'm signing my rights over right now. This is your child and I can't stand in your way”. I said thank you, we exchanged emails with me asking for baby pics and she agreed. This day, this woman saw that just giving birth does not make you a mother, it's who is raising and protecting the child that makes them the parent.
We got the news telling us that her release date and our court date for TPR was a few weeks apart. Due to her rights still intact she had the right to see her children one last time before possibly losing her rights forever. She was fighting the fact that the state wanted to take her rights away of being a parent. Truth be told, she had no shot in winning, she just served three years behind bars for what she did to these same children she was fighting for.
Kristin usually does these visits with the kids, I have never met a bio face to face. This time was different, this person almost killed our child. She is a very dangerous person, she plead out of serving for attempt of murder. This was not the first time she lost children though, it seems like it is a vicious cycle for her. This visit Kristin asked me to go along, there was no way her anxiety was going to let her go in this solo.
A few days before the scheduled appointment, I decided this time, Kristin needs to sit out. With being pregnant and her high emotions; especially what we have gone through after receiving this child in such bad shape. I was adamant that this one I needed to do for me, I wanted to go in and gain the upper hand for us and our child. Although when we arrived, I have never experienced my body shaking so badly.
Our 4 year old child and I pulled up to the building and right away tensions were high for both. We walked into the building and into a very small room with this monster and her attorney. We held hands the entire time, our child was completely comfortable and connected with me. They never once made eye contact, I never saw my daughter ignore anyone, she must of remembered or knew who was in the room with us.
Once I stopped shaking I sat down across the table from this woman that I've hated for about 2 years now. Me and my daughter acted for a while as if she was never there, as she watched us interact. Her attorney was smiling and asked if we can adopt her as well. I looked at my child's mother and started asking her questions of how the child was born and other things that we have always wanted to know. She answered all my questions and I proceeded to tell her what it was like to be us. All the details I had planned to give the judge in two weeks to testify why she is unsafe to be around any children, let alone our baby girl.
After an hour of “Natalie” and this person that gave birth to her, her attacker, we said our good byes. This little girl walked out without looking at anyone, holding her head high. This woman that I thought nothing but negative thoughts for so long grabbed my arm. I turned around, she pulled me in and hugged me. She said to me loud enough for the room to hear, “I'm signing my rights over right now. This is your child and I can't stand in your way”. I said thank you, we exchanged emails with me asking for baby pics and she agreed. This day, this woman saw that just giving birth does not make you a mother, it's who is raising and protecting the child that makes them the parent.
